Yes, I said it–I am turning 30.
On February 22nd, I will officially be in my 30s and I am not too sure how I feel about it. I know I have no choice; I can’t stop the clock or, in the words of Cher, turn back time. How can I be turning 30 when I still feel like a broke 22-year-old drinking “two-buck Chuck” with my roommate… But like it or not, 30 is coming!
Some days I feel like I am kicking ass at life. I am married, I have my own graphic design business which has been going strong for almost five years, and oh yeah, I started this blog as a passion project. All great stuff! Then I see a pop up window on my computer screen… Forbes’ 30 Under 30. I can’t even bring myself to look. I just X out as quickly as possible. Nothing like reading articles on insanely over-accomplished people and finding out they are younger than you to smack you down a few levels. Or when Avicii died I realized he was a few months younger than me and made SO much kick ass music in that time.
Another one that gets me is meeting women who are my age or younger who have children over 10 years old. It honestly freaks me out. I volunteer at the Boys and Girls Club and half the moms are younger than me. I still feel like I am not old enough to be a mom, especially not to a 10-year-old. But yikes, the truth of the matter is, I am.
Sometimes I think, gosh, I am almost 30 and what the hell I have done…. Those people are changing the world or raising other humans and here I am, drawing pictures on my computer and sharing recipes…
I know I am being hard on myself and comparison is the WORST. So I thought that maybe I should ask my friends who have passed 30 a few questions about turning 30 to get a fresh perspective. Instead of posting travel tips or sharing a recipe, this week I have compiled a Q&A with some of my favorite kickass women, all from different upbringings, social circles, ages, and career paths.
Without further ado…
Speciwomen 1: Laura Henryson
Laura and I met through mutual friends almost 10 years ago, and coincidentally, I married her husband’s best friend, Micah. She is down-to-earth yet free spirited, and an all-around great person to be around. She makes life seem easy. She has daughter who is almost 2 years old now and I know she will raise her up to be a kickass lady.
How does it feel to be 30? Any differences you have noticed (good or bad)?
I love being in my 30s. I never feared turning 30, so I welcomed that milestone with open arms. I only fear my 60th birthday for some reason 🙂 I enjoy being “in my 30s” now because I do feel like you are respected a bit more by your elders. I feel more womanly and more mentally and emotionally stable as well. Sometimes when I watch shows like “Friends,” I hear that they are only 25 in an episode, and I can’t believe that I am now six years older than that. Now THAT is bizarre.
Did you feel accomplished with what you had done in your life so far, or did turning 30 freak you out and push you to do more?
Amazingly enough, I actually am where I thought I would be at 30. I am married with a dog and one toddler. (Missing the owning a home part, though!! UGH.)
How did you celebrate your 30th?
Wine tasting in Malibu with a close group of friends.
Any tips or words of wisdom you would give to younger women turning 30?
Embrace turning one year older. Treat yourself to something. Spend your birthday doing something extravagant and fun!
Speciwomen 2: Marsha Rivera
Marsha has officially known me for over half my life now. She was my manager at my first job at Dive N’ Surf, the local surf shop. Marsha has always been a role model for me, whether it was on how to lead by example or how to pivot in life when needed. After working in the surf shop for over a decade, Marsha knew she had to do something else to support her family (which includes her husband, who is now back in school, and her two beautiful daughters), so she studied massage therapy! She now has a growing business called Over The Moon Massage and is in full expansion mode.
How does it feel to be 30? Any differences you have noticed (good or bad)?
Thirty is just a number; in my head, I am still 21!
Did you feel accomplished with what you had done in your life so far, or did turning 30 freak you out and push you to do more?
I always am trying to be better or learn something new. At 30, I had been married for seven years, had a 5-year-old and a 1-year-old, and had been at the same job for 11 years. I had also just finished my massage certification to start a new career path.
How did you celebrate your 30th?
In my head, I wanted to have a huge birthday party, but in reality, I just had cake with my family.
Any tips or words of wisdom you could give to younger women turning 30?
Be kind to yourself. Take risks. Set good boundaries and write down your priorities and goals often, because they change as you change.
Speciwomen 3: Lauren Machen
Lauren and I met years ago when we both worked in the surf industry. (She worked at Transworld Surf and I worked at Body Glove International.) She orchestrated what I still consider to be one of the coolest events I have ever been to: “Shreducations,” a series of events for women in action sports (which is definitely a boys club) to get together, network, and learn a new sport. I attended all of them and successfully learned to wakeboard and fell in love with dirt biking. After her time at Transworld Surf, Lauren, who is also a Southern California native, made a bold move across the country to Vermont for a job at Fuse Marketing. She has truly built an epic life for herself in Vermont. She even makes cross-country skiing during the Vermont winters look fun!
How does it feel to be 30? Any differences you have noticed (good or bad)?
Well, being that I’m now about to turn 40 (eek!), what I remember most about turning 30 was VERY similar to how you are feeling–I still felt like a broke-ass 22-year-old! What I did notice was that changes and decisions in my 30s happened much quicker than they did in my 20s! In my thirties, I rescued a dog, moved across the country to advance my career, bought a house by the lake, got certified as a yoga and SUP instructor, ran a half-marathon, biked a half century ride and travelled all over the world. What I didn’t do was get married or have children. (Although I did attend a few weddings and baby showers, lol.)
Did you feel accomplished with what you had done in your life so far, or did turning 30 freak you out and push you to do more?
At 30, I was four years into a sales and marketing career at an action sports publishing company (Transworld Media) and far from living outside of a paycheck-to-paycheck life. I did, at least, feel like I was in a field that I loved–action sports–and knew it was the direction I wanted to continue to pursue with my career. I was 34 when I decided to take a big leap of faith and move across the country to take an agency job as a PR manager. I felt like this move would really move the needle for me, both financially and personally. Fast forward six years and I’m now a Director at the same agency, and I absolutely love my life in Vermont!
How did you celebrate your 30th?
Ha. Well, it was definitely a blur! My friends threw me a party at a Marriott Hotel bar in San Diego. I just remember seeing lots of friends, old and new, getting drinks bought for me every time I turned around, and dancing until I honestly don’t even remember when, then waking up with a killer headache in my hotel room.
Any tips or words of wisdom you would give to younger women turning 30?
Don’t live off your credit card. My biggest regret in my 20s was living outside of my means (trying to keep up with the Joneses, I guess). I’m STILL paying the price for that, thanks to those hefty credit card interest rates! Secondly, start saving for retirement as soon as you can. If your company offers a 401K, do it. Otherwise, definitely open an IRA. You won’t regret it. Every little bit counts, and it will add up over time. I look at my grandparents, who had no retirement saved up, and now are struggling. I told myself, “Don’t let that be you.” I was fortunate that the companies I worked for not only offered a 401K plan, but also matched up to 4% of my contributions. It was my retirement savings that ultimately enabled me to purchase my first home.
Speciwomen 4: Gulaya Pizarro
I met Gulaya at my first “Epiccurence” conference, an active outdoor retreat for designers, over a year ago. We met during a hike through the Narrows of Zion and talked. I found out she was married and worked for Facebook. We clicked instantly. On the last day of the conference, she mentioned how she loved learning to ride dirt bikes. With riding being a passion of mine too, we went for a cruise. I was so pleased to see another woman enjoy the sport like I did!
Gulaya and her husband also made a bold move and relocated to Seoul Korea! She is now working at the Facebook office in Korea. I admire Gulaya’s spirit and affinity for trying new things. As a very settled person, I hope to take note and incorporate some of Gulaya’s courage to explore in my own life.
How does it feel to be 30? Any differences you have noticed (good or bad)?
I love being in my 30s! In my 30s, I have really felt comfortable with who I am, flaws and all. It sounds so cliche, but it’s true! I used to think once you hit some magic age (around 27 for me) that you would hit some sort of growth plateau, but now I realize that we change all the time. There’s so much more reflection about what you have and what your interests are, rather than comparing yourself to other people. With that comes a sense of freedom and confidence to try new things and pursue things you might have been scared to, or never had the opportunity to try before (hello, dirt biking!).
That confidence has helped personally and professionally. At work, I’m much more assertive than I was early in my career: speaking up in meetings, making and defending decisions, and leading instead of following. There are some people who have never had that problem, but for me, that came with self-confidence, which sometimes takes time to grow. 🙂
The only bad thing is that your body is a little more beat up, and you hurt yourself doing the dumbest everyday stuff (I pulled my back sneezing in line at Safeway). You kind of start appreciating your health and taking care of your body better because of that.
Did you feel accomplished with what you had done in your life so far, or did turning 30 freak you out and push you to do more?
I was happy with where I was in life! At 30, I had been happily married a couple years and was at a job I found really rewarding, so it was (and is) a very very happy life.
There were people who had a lot more than I did, were more accomplished, had a house, kids, the whole thing. On the other side of the coin, there were people who were struggling to find a job, partner, hobby, whatever. Everyone does things in their own way, at their own pace.
I don’t really have milestones I’m trying to achieve by a certain age (with one exception below.) For me, it’s more important to keep pursuing whatever your goal is, no matter how long it takes, rather than stressing out trying to do it in a certain timeframe. As a result, I tend to do everything later in life than most people, but I do get there eventually. As they say, it’s about the journey, not the destination!
How did you celebrate your 30th?
I had one big pre-30 goal, and that was to backpack around the world for a year! I wanted to either be on my trip, or have completed it by the time I was 30. I was on that backpacking trip during my 30th and celebrated in Turkey!
My husband and I had been traveling for about nine months at that point and had taken A LOT of long bus rides. I told him my only request for my birthday was that I wasn’t on a long bus ride – so that’s exactly where I was, of course! I was pretty annoyed on the bus, but at the end of the eight-ish hour long bus ride, I got to have an amazing dinner in Istanbul near the Blue Mosque.
Any tips or words of wisdom you would give to younger women turning 30?
This feels like a good time for a listicle!
- Love your people fiercely and tell them.
- Fight for stuff that’s important to you and roll with the other stuff–your energy is finite.
- Most people are pretty nice and are just as weird as you are.
- Don’t delay for “when it’s a good time” because it might never come (dogs, trips, kids, hobbies).
- Call your parents more.
- Try new things all the time.
- Stretch.
My take away…
After reading the responses my friends gave, I can honestly say, “Bring it on, 30!” I am actually excited about being 30 now. Thanks to this little interview project, I was able to see 30 in a new light and I think 30 is great decade for women in today’s culture. It’s a time for stepping into maturity, for huge career growth, and for not surviving off “two-buck Chuck” anymore! I am inspired for 30.
If any of you have advice on turning 30, please share in the comments below!
1 comment
I so enjoyed this article. It really sheds light on the fact that life is not a race, it’s not the same track for everyone, and that accomplishments and personal growth are valued differently with each individual.
What beautiful “speciwomen” and beautiful human beings!
When I was done reading, I tried to remember how I celebrated my 30th birthday, and for the life of me, I can’t remember! 😆 But then again, I’m coming up on 60 soon.